you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
