Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize