note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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