we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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