remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
