sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It's never too late to be topless.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
