I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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