Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.

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(937): View more from Ohio

He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?

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(512): View more from Texas

He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.

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(937): View more from Ohio

so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.

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(770): View more from Georgia

I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard

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(569): View more from

Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?

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(206): View more from Washington

a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done

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(704): View more from North Carolina

it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes

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