singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He is an equal opportunity slut.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
