Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
