I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
