You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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