I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i out mim tonsoeep
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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