...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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