Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
