I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
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