i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
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