is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
