I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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