She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
