Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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