You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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