An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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