Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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