can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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