i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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