I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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