I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
