I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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