I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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