your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
