And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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