Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize