Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthdayâ€
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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