dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
