im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
