dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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