lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
