living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
