so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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