Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
