It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
