If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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