I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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