This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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