what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
