So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize