hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
