office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize