remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Randomize
