Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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